Just a thought…

Should I tell you guys what I’m thinking right now? How would you look at me if I do? Will you think I’m crazy? Will you think I’m a genius? Will you think I’m a bad person…a good person? How often do you go through questions similar to these with yourself over the simplest of decisions or scenarios? How long does that take you when the scenario is complex?

I do this so often and so thorough that it turns into outright conversations with people all in my head. I guess you could say I’m testing the waters; weighing the pros and cons; loading my responses for rapid fire, witty/sarcastic, indisputable bullets straight to your dome! Because, be honest.. no one wants to say a thought out loud and Lord forbid no one agrees with it. Now you have to defend, explain it, or at least try to get people to understand where it originated from.

Now, when it’s a good thought… oh we can’t wait to say those out loud right? It’s going to make us look like good people, smart people, caring people… you know, people who NEEVER have negative thoughts, right!!!??? Riiiighhttt!!!

Oooohhh, your good and bad conscience… Is that simply a conversation with God or the devil? I saw this video from hip hop legend KRS where he broke down metaphysics to some degree. In short, it’s the branch of philosophy that concerns the existence and nature of things that exist! He instructed a room of people to say something to themselves silently. Then he asked them… what was that voice? You heard it, you said it, but no one else did. But, it existed right? That’s your true self, what we see is just the flesh covering of your thoughts!

Your thoughts are not only yours, they are YOU!!! Own them, use them, nurture them, play with them, allow them to roam freely in your head where they are safe. And while you’re at it…

Embrace Nerdy Things

…Just a thought

Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve… you be the judge!

One day… scratch that, every damn day this guy named Situation appears! Nooo, not that guy from Jersey Shore… but that’s his name nevertheless! Situation is everywhere, all the time, and knows everybody. He’s into politics, religion, relationships, friendships, business…all that. He can be very good to people, extremely bad for people, and quite complicated to people all at the same time or even separately. Whatever the case, Situation ALWAYS runs into Would’ve, Could’ve, and Should’ve! I can’t tell if either of them are male or female because they keep exhibiting the traits of both sexes far too often and with the complexities of genders these days, its safer not assume anything! But, for the flow of MY DAMN STORY… Would’ve, and Should’ve are men and Could’ve is female. Ok, so in my opinion, Would’ve always comes off a bit arrogant and the “know it all type!” They’re always telling Situation how they’d deal with him and even try to make him feel wrong if he doesn’t agree. Then there’s Should’ve who seems like the bossy type. The only problem is; he often has so many regrets it’s hard for Situation to trust anything the guy says. And finally, there’s Could’ve! Bless her heart!!! She usually means well even when Situation doesn’t understand her. She’s been told she has a right to change her mind and perhaps its because she can be more emotionally in tuned than most. Situation is constantly bombarded by these three and has finally had enough. He has listened intuitively to them three and always has good dialogue and conversations with them. However, they always end up going nowhere and never really helping Situation out. So, finally Situation says…. FUCK ALL THREE OF YALL!!! Only God can judge me!!!

E.N.T.

Footnotes …a short story

Latasha’s alarm goes off at 6am for work on Saturday mornings and she usually hits snooze a few times with the same angst that immediately follows. She bellows in silence: I didn’t get enough sleep! The kids stayed up too late! What’s for breakfast? My God, I need more financial help from my kids father! As she finally silences the alarm, she realizes she has several missed calls and a text from her babysitter Talyiah who was called in to work and couldn’t sit for her this weekend. LaTasha’s day was off to an even rougher start to say the least! She was a single mother of 2 young children and in spite of many odds against her, she was doing ok for herself. She worked as a masseuse in an upscale spa in Yorkville, which generally served the uppity clients of its neighboring towns. Luckily her sister lived close by and though they had been feuding a bit lately, she agreed to watch her kids while she went to work. After dropping them off and grabbing her Grande dark roast coffee from Starbucks, she relishes the peace of the 30mn car ride to work. She is not, however looking forward to again pampering the likes of the spa’s usual clients. They were often rude, condescending, impatient and LaTasha was in no mood to put on a smiling face to appease them this morning. Reluctantly, she pressed on and walked in with a cheerful “Good Morning everyone!!!” Her coworkers were sweet and they all got along well. Most of it was because of their mutual dislike for Angela the owner and operator of the spa. The coworkers gleefully return the “good morning,” but all Angela said was “Hey LaTasha…Contessa had a family emergency and wont make it in so you have to cover her 10 o’clk appointment. Oh no, is everything alright, Latasha replied in a concerned tone? Sort of, Angela replied unbothered. Her dad has contracted the covid virus and needs meds and supplies, but otherwise he’s doing alright. LaTasha had met Contessa’s dad Warren, on several occasions and had grown quite fond of him. Though he was a fairly big guy in stature, she likened him to a cuddly teddy bear and wished him well. Then she asked Angela who was scheduled and she replied… Mrs. Kingsley! Ugh, not her LaTasha thought! She’s the epitome of the uppity clients who favored the spa. In her mind, Mrs. Kingsley’s attitude didn’t match her beautiful face and she’s clearly stressed since she comes in so often. As 10 o’clk approaches, LaTasha’s anxiety grows with each passing minute and the thought of her upcoming appointment. “Welcome back Mrs. Kingsley, Angela greeted her as her favorite client walks in. Hey Angela… how are you, how’s business as they exchange pleasantries? We’re doing well, but definitely worried about this growing virus and wondering if and will the government force us to shut down. We’ve already had a girl call off because her dad has contracted it, so LaTasha will be giving you your massage this morning. Oh wow, Mrs. Kingsley replied! Well I certainly hope all works out for you guys. Thanks hon, said Angela. Have a seat and I’ll go check if LaTasha is ready for you. Angela returns and escorts Mrs. Kingsley to her room where LaTasha has everything prepared for her. Hello Mrs. Kingsley, is there any place I need to give extra attention to, LaTasha asked? Mrs. Kingsley replied in typical condescending fashion; I signed up for the full body package…I’m feeling a bit stressed. No problem Mrs. Kingsley, we’ll work those kinks right out. As LaTasha starts her massage she wonders how can a woman this pretty be so worked up. She starts on her shoulders and feel knots and tension in both. Her back was smooth but cracked at almost every section she pressed on. Mrs. Kingsley surprisingly apologizes for the work she needs and even begins to open up a bit on why she’s so stressed. She tells LaTasha her husband has left her and the kids and she now has a mortgage she cant afford. Her job is threatening layoffs and she and her sister weren’t on speaking terms at the moment. As LaTasha gets to Mrs. Kingsley’s feet, she noticed she hadn’t had a pedicure in quite some time. She then begins to see Mrs. Kingsley in a totally different light. Ironically, her story read like the footnotes of her own life.

E.N.T.

I wanna steal my kids skills!!!

Sounds a bit bogus right? Selfish? Downright wrong on all levels, huh? Well, let me explain a little bit. You know the old saying “…if I could go back in time with the knowledge I have now…?” Yeah, well I just took it a step further and wanna go back with a little something extra. (I’ll also explain how the kids will be ok as well, so just let me have my moment, ok….cool)!

Now, I can just imagine how dope I would be if I had started writing poetry and songs in 6,7,8th grade like my daughter. No doubt I’d be an accomplished artist by 30yrs old! What if I had the bone and muscle density my 9yr old son has right now when I went out for my high school football team sophomore year. I was good enough to start at wide receiver but weighing 135lbs had me shook and I quit right before we started practicing with pads on. The lil dude can bench press 50lbs already! And dont even get me started on the leadership qualities my other daughter has… If I put them all together, I’d be captain of a professional sports team and writing monologues to share in the meetings I’m holding while presiding over the screen actors guild, during the off season of course!!!

My wonderful wife feels me too and doesn’t even know it… until til she reads this!!! Lol… RIGHT NOW she’s whining because her back hurts (yes, I did give her a lengthy massage… thank you) and she fears she’s gonna really hate getting old. Not that she’s vain and cares about the beauty that “so call fades,” it’s her fear of the body being succeptable to ailments. I bet she wants to steal our son’s solid lil muscles right now too; or better yet our daughter’s dancer body; or our other daughter’s metabolism! Put it all together for her and she’d be Debbie Allen’s choreographer and a strength and health coach when she’s not a practicing chiropractor!!!

NOW, image how dope our kids would be if me and my wife had ALL their skills first and early enough in life to have time to develop them!!! We’re in a good place now, don’t get me wrong… but, how much further could we possibly be?

Moral of the story… sometimes it’s best to be selfish, to take time to nurture your gifts and talents! If I steal my kids skills, I can give back AND pay it forward at the same damn time!!!

E.N.T.

Lent, leant, lint

This Lent, I’ve decided to give up something not so tangible as social media as I’ve done in years past. I’m not giving up certain foods cuz I’m in the gym and I need my energy, protein, and necessary vitamins and minerals. And nope, I’m not giving up alcohol because frankly… I could use a drink as I write this right now. Don’t judge me either…hpmh!!! I AM GIVING UP PROCRASTINATION!!!

Yep, for far to long I leant on excuses as to why I haven’t taken the time to write. I lent my time to a host of other nonproductive things that cluttered my days like….lint! So, now, I’m committed to writing SOMETHING for at least 30-60mn everyday of Lent. Some will get posted, some wont… thanks for “Lent’ing” me your time.

E.N.T.

Hmmm

This is a week late, but anywho… I wonder what would happen if I simply started to write. No direction, subject, aim, focus, target audience, or even a good spelling and grammar check… Wait, gotta get ready for work…be right back…………..

…………….Well that took hella long! I work outside and need to dress in layers which is a process I tell ya. It’s the coldest day (so far) of this winter season in the Chi… a brisk -4° to start the morning, warming to a balmy 7° this afternoon! And let’s not even get into the added windchill or the upcoming “colder” weekend. But, randomness aside, let’s get back to the first sentence. See, I haven’t blogged or written anything creative for that matter in (I cant believe it) a couple of years!!! WTF… Now, to my defense I did have a LOT of good shit happening in my life like getting married and starting a blended family (hardest thing I’ve ever done/doing in my life but I digress…for now, may be a good post for later), but still… 2 years yall, …RIDICULOUS!!! I have jotted some great ideas for posts, have some business ideas I need to put in motion but can never find the time to write. EXCUSES, BRO….EXCUSES!!! So, this post was simply to …try to write my way, out of my way, so I can write the way I really want to write!!! Yep, that’s it, that’s all… Peace yall, see ya (in print) soon. OH, and as always…

E.N.T

I “Ran” Into Huckleberry!!!

huckleberry

[Image credit: http://www.quickmeme.com]

Ok my people, stay with me for a second as I break this down! This may not even be nerdy (aside from my mind working a bit different than most, perhaps), but it definitely deserves a post! I’m sure we can agree that there’s a certain amount of respect you have to give a person for standing on their convictions. But, allow me to apply a little pressure to that theory…

Light pressure: Ok, it’s been a several months since I’ve posted….UGHH!!! Most times life just gets in the way…I got tons of shit to do! If you read “The Duality of Al” (insert shameless plug…GO READ THAT AFTER THIS…) you already know Alvernon is quite anal. So, I try to stick to the “nerdy” theme WAAAY too much. But, this is MY BLOG and I can write whatever I want!!! 🙂 i.e. My ipod is better than yours!!! My sock drawer is military organized!!! I think the Popeye’s chicken spokeswoman is HOTT!!! 😉 Although you have to respect a man for standing up for his convictions, it can strangle the writer in me. Clearly I have more topics I could touch on, but I’m trying (albeit very slowly and half assed) to build a brand here! …happy medium search…engage…

Hard pressure: Several months ago again, my girlfriend and I ran the Night Nation Run to stand up for cancer research. It was my first 5k run and I was amazed by the amount of ppl who were running, involved in planning, and/or just being there to party. The affects of cancer was very personal for almost everyone out there…. except for Huckleberry!!!

Runners take your mark! Us against cancer right? We’re over a thousand strong, so cancer goes (at least in my mind) “What, nobody wants to play for blood???”

And I swear…as we’re awaiting the sound off to start… this guy lights up, smokes his entire cigarette, and didn’t give one, single, solitary, fuck who had a problem with it!!! I was appalled at the disrespect to those who lost a loved one to cancer, but still had some respect at the balls it took to look death in its eye and say….I’ll be your Huckleberry!!!

E.N.T.

 

 

 

And the nominees are….

Ok… sooo… https://virgobeauty.wordpress.com/  nominated me for “this” award…

sisterhoodbloggeraward

Don’t be confused…we’ve already established I’m quite a man! She challenged me to push past the title and delve deeper so here I go. ***Side note: Cool Ass Al loves a good challenge. Read “The Duality of Al” for further insight!!!***

RULES

  1. Thank the blogger who nominated you. Virgobeauty, you’re awesome and I thank you! Oh, did you even know I’m a Virgo as well?
  2. Put the award logo on your blog. Done!
  3. Answer the ten questions sent to you. …keep reading! 😉
  4. Make up ten new questions for your nominees to answer. …read some more, please! 🙂
  5. Nominate 10 blogs. ok, you’re up: hayatlmaskeen.wordpress.com, lafayetteangel.com, artistgirlcorpworld.com, fromthecsweet.com, stepville.com, readbetweenthelyme.com, threesaherd.com, jessiejeanine.com, wtmlpart2.wordpress.com, ccchanel41.wordpress.com

My Ten Answers

1. What part of today felt purposeful, yet, it was routine, or simplistic? -My girlfriend got pissed off by my twitter beef…which I found a little funny. She simply holds me down!!! 😉

2. Name three things that made you smile today. -A pic of my daughter and I made a local newspaper; I gained a new follower to my blog; received a good msg and funny response from a stranger on fb

3. What is something that you need to hear? -Music

4. Right now, what are you grateful for that is enough? -Air

5. What book, movie, song, or show are you indulging in? -Zoom (Commodores)

6. In what area of life, do you need to forgive yourself at this moment? I actually have no regrets right now.

7. If there was a book about your life, what would you title it? A Cool World Order

8.Provide five words that describe you. Steady, humble, confident, honest, peaceful

9. Often times, we get busy with the daily tasks of life. Who would you like to hug, and express your love to today? My daughter, mother, and girlfriend

10. What quote gives you hope? You can eat an entire elephant, if you take it a fork full at a time!

My Ten Questions For My Nominees

  1. What is your favorite “personal” blog posting, or the one you’re most proud of?
  2. What motivates/inspires you to write?
  3. Tell me something nerdy, quirky, or odd about yourself!
  4. If you had to choose between tv or music, which would you choose?
  5. What’s your favorite song?
  6. What’s your favorite movie?
  7. What’s your favorite place you’ve traveled?
  8. What’s your proudest moment?
  9. Name something you were embarrassed about then, but can laugh about it now.
  10. Dogs or Cats?

Somebody Call The Cops!

Ever hear someone say something ever so common, but it makes you laugh like crazy when they say it? I love moments like these and I grow fonder of the people it comes from because it displays what I find unique about them. It reminds me of that one lane of joy only they can provide and I find myself thinking about them and enjoying their company even when they’re not around. So, one night my girlfriend and I were enjoying some quality time and sharing stories of our pasts. We both grew up in the inner city of Chicago so we’ve both seen and/or experienced situations where a police presence was needed. Notice I said “police!” While listening to one of her experiences, she goes, “…and I’m like, somebody call the cops!!!” We’re still laughing about it to this day! For some reason, I felt like nobody uses the word “cops” anymore and she said it with such enthusiasm like it was quite the norm…and it is, really. But, for some reason it felt like I hadn’t heard it since the movie Robo Cop was out! Perhaps she’s been living in the far suburbs for too long and it’s given her a nerdy accent to the word? Perhaps it was me imagining this sweet girl in a panicking situation and so far out of her element she really did want to see Robo Cop on the scene immediately? In the next passing days and weeks, the word “cops” kept popping up all around me. You know how it is… like when you buy a new car for instance…you start noticing just how many “cars like yours” are on the roads all of a sudden? I mean, cops were everywhere! I even heard it numerous times in a lot of rap songs I recorded! So, my apologies sweetheart. Though the shit is still funny as ever… I sure wouldn’t want you to call Robo Police on me!!!

E.N.T.